Dregs Report

Woman with Go-Getter Attitude Crushed by Single Libertarian Party Affiliate Meeting

CANTON, GA — Local marketing professional and self-described “doer” Tessa Marks, 33, entered her first Libertarian Party affiliate meeting Wednesday…

May 22, 2025

Defense Think Tank Analyst Casually Refers to Eastern Europe as “The Chessboard” at Happy Hour

Libertarian Party Devastated to Lose Ballot Access for Race They Had No One Running In

Wife of Professional Marxist Slips in Yet Another Passive-Aggressive Jab at Middle-Class Friends for Having Money

Couple Who Take Edibles and Order Uber Eats Every Night Say They Don’t Want Kids Because Their Life Is “Already Full”

Man Who Hates Church Totally Fine with Witch Stuff for Some Reason

Atheist Consoles Grieving Mother by Reminding Her It’s All Just a Series of Chemical Reactions

Must Read

Calvinist Takes Credit for Choosing to Attend Church, Briefly Forgets Everything He Believes

May 22, 2025

We Watched Every Ayn Rand Film Adaptation and Ranked Them Starting at 0 and Descending Into the Negative Numbers Where They Belong

May 22, 2025

Couple Who Take Edibles and Order Uber Eats Every Night Say They Don’t Want Kids Because Their Life Is “Already Full”

May 22, 2025

Broke Marxist Threatens to Stop Paying Rent “Until Palestine Is Free”

May 22, 2025

Local Tankie Sues for Defamation Using Legal System They Publicly Denounce as Bourgeois Tool of Oppression

PHILADELPHIA, PA — Local Marxist-Leninist activist Cass Freeman, 26, has filed a defamation lawsuit this…

May 22, 2025

Politics

Local Libertarian Announces Bold Plan to “Outreach to the Urban Community” While Pulling Pants Up to Just Below Nipples

May 22, 2025

New Strategy Proposed: Libertarians Urged to Maybe Not Put Biggest Weirdos Front and Center; Roundly Rejected, Immediately Booed

May 23, 2025

Religion

Anglican Priest Accidentally Preaches Entire Sermon from The Silmarillion; Congregation Too Polite to Interrupt

May 25, 2025

Man Derives Meaning from Life by Explaining That Life Has No Meaning

May 22, 2025

Pastor Accidentally Left at Soup Kitchen After Volunteer Event When Congregation Mistakes Him for Homeless Man

May 22, 2025

Latest News

Woman Threatens to Ruin Her Own Life Until Living Wage Guaranteed to All Workers

2 Min Read

Libertarian Shocked by 27th Straight Election Loss After Spending Entire Campaign Giving Speeches to Other Libertarians

3 Min Read

College Marxist Assumes Yet Another Ethnic Identity

2 Min Read

World Leaders Revealed to Be Ageless Demonic Entities Sustained by Human Suffering; Your Neoliberal Friend Says “That’s a Good Thing, Actually”

2 Min Read

Pragmatic Libertarian Shocked to Learn He’s Just as Annoying in Government as Out of It

2 Min Read

Mega Church Unveils Drive-Thru Baptism for Busy Believers on the Go

3 Min Read

Libertarian Affiliate Applauds Year of Denunciations, Procedural Drama, and No Observable Impact

3 Min Read

Neoliberal Friend Says U.S. Foreign Policy ‘Generally Goes Pretty Well’ Despite Trail of Smoldering Craters

1 Min Read